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The Sleepy Blind Man and the Elephant

December 7, 2012

It’s Friday, and I need to finish decorating the house for Christmas.  Still, some things should be discussed:

GOLDEN TRIANGLE, Thailand (AP) — In the lush hills of northern Thailand, a herd of 20 elephants is excreting some of the world’s most expensive coffee.

Trumpeted as earthy in flavor and smooth on the palate, the exotic new brew is made from beans eaten by Thai elephants and plucked a day later from their dung. A gut reaction inside the elephant creates what its founder calls the coffee’s unique taste.

Stomach turning or oddly alluring, this is not just one of the world’s most unusual specialty coffees. At $1,100 per kilogram ($500 per pound), it’s also among the world’s priciest.

So the “Jumbo Joe” blend apparently costs $50 for a cup of coffee.  This is right up there with the foie grois burgers decorated with gold leaf and all the other dumb things that someone will cook up to get people to spend money.  To a cheap redneck from Southern Ohio, this is a marvel of the modern world.  I have to admit, I love a world where reasonably normal people have the choice to spend a frivilous amount of dollars on some affectation.  It shows that we as humans have really worked to bring the dumb habits of the rich to as many people as would want to do it.  In the past, only a king could be convinced that elephant poop could be roasted and brewed into a tasty delicacy.  Now, anyone with a few bucks can be a moron.

Would I buy a cup of this stuff?  Heck no.  I won’t go to Peet’s unless I’m totally desperate… McDonalds is fine and I can usually get coffee for a buck.  In general, I brew my own, and it’s not bad at a few pennies a cup… The local WinCo will occasionally drop the price of coffee, and we’ll get a five-pound bag, and there are always discount buys at the Grocery Outlet.

Would I drink a cup of this stuff?  Probably not.  I’m mostly cheap even with my company money, so I wouldn’t “let” my company buy me something this dumb.  And I doubt I’d ever be in a position where someone would want to buy me something that extravagant… and if they did, I’d probably go for a couple fingers of a nice Bourbon, to be honest.

Besides, the WinCo stuff is actually pretty good…

3 Comments leave one →
  1. December 7, 2012 5:07 pm

    It never ceases to dazzle me what people will pay for coffee… as long as it’s free trade, I suppose…

  2. December 7, 2012 4:59 pm

    I never ceases to dazzle me what people will pay for a cup of coffee, including myself at times. 🙂

  3. JWoods permalink
    December 7, 2012 9:35 am

    Does Elephant coffee contribute to global warming? Seems to me the bean flavoring process, would release methane also. Roasting the beans would also add to the beans global warming problem.This could rival Chernobyl as an environmental catastrophe. Sarc off now.

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