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Planets still orbiting….

March 23, 2011

More than once I have blogged about what a raw deal feminism really is for women – mostly because it only validates when women act like men.

  • Being a housewife: bad
  • Being a corporate VP: good
  • Being a stay at home mom: soooooo medieval
  • Being a DINK (dual income no kids): freedom
  • Being a virgin on your wedding night: repressed
  • Being unclear on how many men that you’ve actually slept with: “you’ve come a long way baby!”
  • Abortion: the modern feminist sacrament
  • Pro-life: for men -“those women haters.” for women – “those self haters”

I could go on – but you get the idea. So imagine my amusement when I read this article at Real Clear Politics

In “Manning Up: How the Rise of Women Has Turned Men into Boys,” Kay Hymowitz explores the rise of the “child-man,” a slovenly creature who spends his twenties (and, in some cases, his thirties and forties) in the grip of a prolonged adolescence…

Today’s child-man, as “Manning Up” describes him, is a guy’s guy, albeit one who has a vacant sense of responsibility, few visible manners, and, when faced with a world that has turned traditional gender roles upside down, throws up his hands-and reaches for the Xbox and a beer

…”What all of this adds up to for women,” Hymowitz writes, “is a gap between the cultural ideals behind preadulthood-equality, freedom, personal achievement, sexual self-expression-and biology’s pitiless clock.” Women, in other words, can wake up at 39 realizing they forgot to have a family, while men their age are either a) taken, b) single for a reason, or c) busy scouting out 27-year-olds.

The implications – gasp – involve women share culpability in the mess and to expect the men to – gasp again – act like men. And to -double gasp – stop acting like the greatest thing they could achieve is acting like men over the last 10,000 years themselves

biology, like it or not, isn’t fair. Second, if you expect nothing of men, they’ll likely deliver nothing, particularly in the realm of parenthood. Third, both men and women need to rethink our aggressively individualist culture in order to have meaningful lives together…

….[one] reason women are losing it is that they’re repeatedly told that they’re no different than men-and many believe it, particularly in the realm of sex.This, of course, is clearly not true. …[there is] heightened correlation between female promiscuity and depression

so, by playing the feminist script, we’re encouraging the worst behavior by imitating their behavior, and simultaneously making ourselves incredibly unhappy. Men might be from Mars, and they’re more than happy for women to join them there – but why the HECK would we want to? Staying in our own orbit validates what makes women uniquely cool – like Lucy in “The Voyage of the Dawn Treader” tells the little girl:  “when you grow up, you should want to be just like YOU”.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. March 26, 2011 10:14 pm

    Good post. Part of the reason why the situation Hymowitz is taking root, though, is an “oversupply” of young educated women. Right now the young women to men ratio in many universities and urban areas is about 60% to 40%. That’s a lot of extra women, many throwing themselves on men. Men don’t need to work very hard to get them, which, in turn, makes them unappealing.

    • March 27, 2011 3:56 pm

      thanks for the visit/comment. I think in the end it comes back to the same root of “expectations set too low” – the women who are in the highest demand, even where there is over supply are the ones who tend to be harder to get. Can’t be chased if you’re not running 🙂
      And have we looked at the root cause of why more women than men? There is a strong encouragement for women to attend universities (good). Not a strong encouragement for men to attend because they get away with being permanent adolescents…(bad) and they’re “not a minority group”

  2. March 24, 2011 5:48 am

    Well said Lynn. There but for the grace of God go I, by the way. The closest I’ve ever come to flirting with leftist ideas would be the feminist tendencies of my youth. Among other misapprehensions, I was quite convinced that while marrying might be fine, I would never have kids.

    I’m really glad I changed my mind. Some of my husband’s coworkers are those “woke up at 39” types the article mentions, and I feel terribly sorry for them, really. The ones that still manage to marry a decent guy–often it’s too late to have the kids they sorely want.

    It stinks that we ladies don’t have all the time guys do to “play the field,” but what are you gonna do? Putting a cat in the oven don’t make it a biscuit.


    • March 27, 2011 3:59 pm

      Linda – ever see “The Life of Brian” where one of the philosophers who was a man told the rest of the philosophers “I want to have a baby” to which he was told “you can’t. You’re a man”. His response ?
      “YOU”RE REPRESSING ME!!!!!” Well….same thing with women not having all the time to play the field. We can get pregnant (I’m not sure – has any man had a gender change and gotten pregnant? My guess is no), men can’t. Men can play the field longer. It’s basic biology – we can rail against it, but it’s about as effective as telling the ocean tides to stop.

      It is sad about the coworkers….I know many people in that situation.


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